Gideon shoved a hand through his hair and
exhaled harshly. “You don’t mean that.”
I was suddenly very tired, exhausted from
fighting with myself over him. “I really do. You and
me…it was a mistake.”
His jaw tightened. “It wasn’t. The way I handled
it afterward was the mistake.”
I stared at him, startled by the fierceness of his
denial. “I wasn’t talking about the sex, Gideon. I’m
talking about my agreeing to this crazy strangerswith-
benefits deal between us. I knew it was all
wrong from the beginning. I should’ve listened to
my instincts.”
“Do you want to be with me, Eva?”
“No. That’s what—”
“Not like we discussed at the bar. More than
that.”
My heart started to pound. “What are you talking
about?”
“Everything.” He left the bar and came closer. “I
want to be with you.”
“You didn’t seem like you did Saturday.” My
arms tightened around my middle.
“I was…reeling.”
“So? I was, too.”
His hands went to his hips. Then his arms
crossed like mine. “Christ, Eva.”
I watched him squirm and felt a flare of hope. “If
that’s all you’ve got, we’re done.”
“The hell we are.”
“We’ve already hit a dead end if you’re going to
take a head trip every time we have sex.”
He visibly struggled with what to say. “I’m used
to having control. I need it. And you blew it all to
hell in the limousine. I didn’t handle that well.”
“Ya think?”
“Eva.” He approached. “I’ve never experienced
anything like that. I didn’t think it was possible for
me to. Now that I have…I’ve got to have it. I’ve got
to have you.”
“It’s just sex, Gideon. Super awesome sex, but
that can seriously screw with your head when the
two people doing it aren’t good for each other.”
“Bullshit. I’ve admitted I fucked up. I can’t
change what happened, but I can sure as shit get
pissed that you want to cut me off because of it.
You laid out your rules and I adjusted to
accommodate them, but you won’t make even a
tiny adjustment for me. You have to meet me
halfway.” His face was hard with frustration. “At
least give me a damn inch.”
I stared at him, trying to figure out what he was
doing and where this was going. “What do you
want, Gideon?” I asked softly.
He caught me to him and cupped my cheek in
one hand. “I want to keep feeling the way I feel
when I’m with you. Just tell me what I have to do.
And give me some room to screw up. I’ve never
done this before. There’s a learning curve.”
I placed my palm over his heart and felt its
pounding rhythm. He was anxious and
passionate, and that had me on edge. How was I
supposed to respond? Did I go with my gut or my
common sense? “Done what before?”
“Whatever it takes to spend as much time with
you as possible. In and out of bed.”
The rush of delight that swept through me was
ridiculously powerful. “Do you understand how
much work and time a relationship between us is
going to take, Gideon? I’m wiped out already.
Plus I’m still working on some personal stuff, and I
have my new job…my crazy mother…”
My fingers covered his mouth before he could
open it. “But you’re worth it, and I want you bad
enough. So I guess I don’t have a choice, do I?”
“Eva. Damn you.” Gideon lifted me, hitching one
arm beneath my rear to urge me to wrap my legs
around his waist. He kissed me hard on the mouth
and nuzzled his nose against mine. “We’ll figure it
out.”
“You say that as if it’ll be easy.” I knew I was
high-maintenance and he was obviously going to
be the same.
“Easy’s boring.” He carried me over to the bar
and set me down on a barstool. He pulled the
dome off my place setting and revealed a
massive cheeseburger and fries. The meal was
still warm, thanks to a heated granite slab beneath
the plate.
“Yum,” I murmured, becoming aware of how
hungry I was. Now that we’d talked, my appetite
had returned full force.
He snapped open my napkin and laid it over my
lap with a squeeze to my knee; then he took the
seat beside me. “So, how do we do this?”
“Well, you pick it up with your hands and put it in
your mouth.”
He shot me a wry look that made me smile. It
felt good to smile. It felt good to be with him. It
usually did…for a little while. I took a bite of my
burger, moaning when I got a full hit of its flavor. It
was a traditional cheeseburger, but the taste was
divine.
“Good, right?” he asked.
“Very good. In fact, a guy who knows about
burgers this good might be worth keeping to
myself.” I wiped my mouth and hands. “How
resistant are you to exclusivity?”
As he set his burger down, there was an eerie
stillness to him. I couldn’t begin to guess what he
was thinking. “I assumed that was implied in our
arrangement. But to avoid any doubts, I’ll be clear
and say there won’t be any other men for you,
Eva.”
A shiver moved through me at the blunt finality
in his tone and the iciness of his gaze. I knew he
had a dark side; I’d learned long ago how to spot
and avoid men who had dangerous shadows in
their eyes. But the familiar alarm bells didn’t ring
around Gideon as they maybe should have. “But
women are okay?” I asked to lighten the mood.
His brows rose. “I know your roommate is
bisexual. Are you?”
“Would that bother you?”
“Sharing you would bother me. It’s not an
option. Your body belongs to me, Eva.”
“And yours belongs to me? Exclusively?”
His gaze turned hot. “Yes, and I expect you to
take frequent and excessive advantage of it.”
Well, then…“But you’ve seen me naked,” I
teased, my voice husky. “You know what you’re
getting. I don’t. I love what I’ve seen of your body
so far, but that hasn’t been a whole lot.”
“We can rectify that now.”
The thought of him stripping for me made me
squirm in my seat. He noticed and his mouth
curved wickedly.
“You’d better not,” I said regretfully. “I was late
getting back on Friday.”
“Tonight, then.”
I swallowed hard. “Absolutely.”
“I’ll be sure to clear my schedule by five.” He
resumed eating, completely at ease with the fact
that we’d both just penciled “mind-blowing sex”
into our mental day calendars.
“You don’t have to.” I opened the mini ketchup
bottle by my plate. “I need to hit the gym after
work.”
“We’ll go together.”
“Really?” I turned the bottle upside down and
thumped the bottom with my palm.
He took it from me and used his knife to coax
the ketchup onto my plate. “It’s probably best for
me to work off some energy before I get you
naked. I’m sure you’d like to be able to walk
tomorrow.”
I stared at him, astonished by the casualness
with which he’d made the statement and the rueful
amusement on his face that told me he wasn’t
entirely kidding. My sex clenched in delicious
anticipation. I could easily picture becoming
seriously addicted to Gideon Cross.
I ate some fries, thinking of someone else who
was addicted to Gideon. “Magdalene could be a
problem for me.”
He swallowed a bite of his burger and washed
it down with a swig from his bottled water. “She
told me she’d talked to you, and that it didn’t go
well.”
I gave props to Magdalene’s scheming and the
clever attempt to cut me off at the pass. I’d have to
be very careful with her, and Gideon was going to
have to do something about her—like cut her off,
period.
“No, it didn’t go well,” I agreed. “But then I don’t
appreciate being told that you don’t respect the
women you fuck and that the moment you shoved
your dick into me you were done with me.”
Gideon stilled. “She said that?”
“Word for word. She also said you’re keeping
on her ice until you’re ready to settle down.”
“Did she now?” His low voice had a chilling bite
to it.
My stomach knotted, knowing things could
either go really right or really wrong, depending on
what Gideon said next. “Don’t you believe me?”
“Of course I believe you.”
“She could be a problem for me,” I repeated,
not letting it go.
“She won’t be a problem. I’ll talk to her.”
I hated the thought of him talking to her,
because it made me sick with jealousy. I figured
that was an issue I should disclose up front.
“Gideon…”
“Yes?” He’d finished his burger and was
working on the fries.
“I’m a very jealous person. I can be irrational
with it.” I poked at my burger with a fry. “You might
want to think about that, and whether or not you
want to deal with someone who has self-esteem
issues like I do. It was one of my sticking points
when you first propositioned me, knowing it was
going to drive me nuts having women salivating all
over you and not having the right to say anything
about it.”
“You have the right now.”
“You’re not taking me seriously.” I shook my
head and took another bite of my cheeseburger.
“I’ve never been as serious about anything in
my life.” Reaching over, Gideon ran a fingertip
over the corner of my mouth, and then licked off
the dab of sauce he’d collected. “You’re not the
only one who can get possessive. I’m very
proprietary about what’s mine.”
I didn’t doubt that for a minute.
I took another bite and thought of the night
ahead. I was eager. Ridiculously so. I was dying to
see Gideon naked. Dying to run my hands and
lips all over him. Dying to have another go at
driving him crazy. And I was damn near desperate
to be under him, to feel him straining over me,
pounding into me, coming hard and deep inside
me…
“Keep thinking those thoughts,” he said roughly,
“and you’ll be late again.”
I looked at him with raised brows “How did you
know what I’m thinking?”
“You get this look on your face when you’re
turned on. I intend to put that look on your face as
often as possible.” Gideon covered his plate
again and stood, withdrawing a business card
from his pocket and setting it down beside me. I
could see that he’d written his home and cell
phone numbers on the back. “I feel stupid asking
this question considering our present
conversation, but I need your cell phone number.”
“Oh.” I forcibly dragged my thoughts out of the
bedroom. “I have to get one first. It’s on my to-do
list.”
“What happened to the phone you were texting
with last week?”
My nose wrinkled. “My mother was using it to
track my movements around the city. She’s a
tad…overprotective.”
“I see.” He brushed the backs of his fingers
down my cheek. “That’s what you were talking
about when you said your mom is stalking you.”
“Yes, unfortunately.”
“Okay, then. We’ll take care of the phone after
work before we head to the gym. It’s safer for you
to have one. And I want to be able to call you
whenever I feel like it.”
I set down the quarter of my burger that I
couldn’t eat, and wiped my hands and mouth.
“That was delicious. Thank you.”
“It was my pleasure.” He leaned over me and
pressed his lips briefly to mine. “Do you need to
use the washroom?”
“Yes. I need my toothbrush from my purse, too.”
A few minutes later, I found myself standing in a
washroom hidden behind a door that blended
seamlessly with the mahogany paneling behind
the flat screens. We brushed our teeth side by
side at the double sink vanity, our gazes meeting
in our mirrored reflections. It was such a domestic,
normal thing to do and yet we both seemed to
delight in it.
“I’ll take you back down,” he said, crossing his
office to the coatrack.
I followed him, but veered off when we reached
his desk. I went to it and put my hand on the clear
space in front of his chair. “Is this where you are
most of the day?”
“Yes.” He shrugged into his jacket and I wanted
to bite him, he looked so delectable.
Instead, I hopped up to sit directly in front of his
chair. According to my watch I had five minutes.
Barely enough time to get back to work, but still. I
couldn’t resist exercising my new rights. I pointed
at his chair. “Sit.”
His brows rose, but he came over without
argument and settled gracefully into the seat.
I spread my legs and crooked my finger.
“Closer.”
He rolled forward, filling the space between my
thighs. He wrapped his arms around my hips and
looked up at me. “One day soon, Eva, I’m going to
fuck you right here.”
“Just a kiss for now,” I murmured, bending
forward to take his mouth. With my hands on his
shoulders for balance, I licked across his parted
lips; then slipped inside and teased him with
gentleness.
Groaning, he deepened the kiss, eating at my
mouth in a way that made me achy and wet.
“One day soon,” I repeated against his lips, “I’m
going to kneel beneath this desk and suck you off.
Maybe while you’re on the phone playing with your
millions like Monopoly. You, Mr. Cross, will pass
Go and collect your two hundred dollars.”
His mouth curved against mine. “I can see how
this is going to go. You’re going to make me lose
my mind coming everywhere I can in your tight,
sexy body.”
“Are you complaining?”
“Angel, I’m salivating.”
I was bemused by the endearment, although I
liked its sweetness. “Angel?”
He hummed a soft assent and kissed me.
I couldn’t believe what a difference an hour
made. I left Gideon’s office in a completely
different frame of mind than when I’d entered it.
The feel of his hand at the small of my back made
my body hum with anticipation rather than the
misery I’d felt on the way in.
I waved bye to Scott and smiled brightly at the
unsmiling receptionist.
“I don’t think she likes me,” I told Gideon, as we
waited for the elevator.
“Who?”
“Your receptionist.”
He glanced over that way and the redhead
beamed at him.
“Well,” I murmured. “She likes you.”
“I guarantee her paychecks.”
My mouth curved. “Yes, I’m sure that’s what it is.
It couldn’t possibly have anything to do with you
being the sexiest man alive.”
“Am I now?” He caged me to the wall and
burned me with a searing gaze.
I set my hands against his abdomen, licking my
lower lip when I felt the hard ridges of muscle
tighten under my touch. “Just an observation.”
“I like you.” With his palms pressed flat to the
wall on either side of my head, he lowered his
mouth to mine and kissed me softly.
“I like you back. You do realize you’re at work,
don’t you?”
“What good is being the boss if you can’t do
what you want?”
“Hmm.”
When a car arrived, I ducked under Gideon’s
arm and slid into it. He prowled in after me; then
circled me like a predator, sliding up behind me to
pull me back against him. His hands pushed into
my front pockets and splayed against my
hipbones, keeping me tucked close. The warmth
of his touch so close to where I ached for him was
a special brand of torture. In retaliation, I wriggled
my butt against him and smiled when he hissed
out a breath and hardened.
“Behave,” he admonished gruffly. “I have a
meeting in fifteen minutes.”
“Will you think of me while you’re sitting at your
desk?”
“Undoubtedly. You’ll definitely think about me
while you’re sitting at yours. That’s an order, Miss
Tramell.”
My head fell back against his chest, loving the
bite of command in his voice. “I don’t see how I
couldn’t, Mr. Cross, considering how I think of you
everywhere else I go.”
He stepped out with me when we reached the
twentieth floor. “Thank you for lunch.”
“I think that’s my line.” I backed away. “See you
later, Dark and Dangerous.”
His brows rose at my nickname for him. “Five
o’clock. Don’t make me wait.”
One of the cars in the left bank of elevators
arrived. Megumi stepped out and Gideon stepped
in, his gaze locked with mine until the doors
closed.
“Whew,” she said. “You scored. I’m pea green
with envy.”
I couldn’t think of anything to say to that. It was
all still too new and I was afraid to jinx it. In the
back of my mind, I knew these feelings of
happiness couldn’t last. Everything was going too
well.
I rushed to my desk and got to work.
“Eva.” I looked up to see Mark standing in the
threshold of his office. “Could I talk to you a
minute?”
“Of course.” I grabbed my tablet, even though
his grim face and tone warned me they might not
be needed. When Mark shut the door behind me,
my apprehension increased. “Is everything all
right?”
“Yes.” He waited until I was seated; then took
the chair beside me rather than the one behind his
desk. “I don’t know how to say this…”
“Just say it. I’ll figure it out.”
He looked at me with compassionate eyes and
a cringe of embarrassment. “It’s not my place to
interfere. I’m just your boss and there’s a line that
comes with that, but I’m going to cross it because
I like you, Eva, and I want you to work here for a
long time.”
My stomach tightened. “That’s great. I really
love my job.”
“Good. Good, I’m glad.” He shot me a quick
smile. “Just…be careful with Cross, okay?”
I blinked, startled by the direction of the
conversation. “Okay.”
“He’s brilliant, rich, and sexy, so I understand
the appeal. As much as I love Steven, I get a little
flustered around Cross myself. He’s just got that
kind of pull.” Mark talked fast and shifted with
obvious embarrassment. “And I can totally see
why he’s interested in you. You’re beautiful, smart,
honest, considerate…I could go on, because
you’re great.”
“Thanks,” I said quietly, hoping I didn’t look as ill
as I felt. This sort of warning from a friend, and
knowing that others would think of me as just
another babe-of-the-week, was exactly the sort of
thing that preyed on my insecurities.
“I just don’t want to see you get hurt,” he
muttered, looking as miserable as I felt. “Part of
that’s selfish, I’ll admit. I don’t want to lose a great
assistant because she doesn’t want to work in a
building owned by an ex.”
“Mark, it means a lot to me that you care and
that I’m valuable to you around here. But you don’t
have to worry about me. I’m a big girl. Besides,
nothing is going to get me to quit this job.”
He blew out his breath, clearly relieved. “All
right. Let’s put it away and get to work.”
So we did, but I set myself up for future torture
by subscribing to a daily Google alert for Gideon’s
name. And when five o’clock rolled around, my
awareness of my many inadequacies was still
spreading through my happiness like a stain.
Gideon was as prompt as he’d threatened to
be and he didn’t seem to notice my introspective
mood as we rode down in a crowded elevator.
More than one woman in the car cast furtive
glances in his direction, but that sort of thing I
didn’t mind. He was hot. I would’ve been surprised
if they hadn’t looked.
He caught my hand when we cleared the
turnstiles, linking his fingers with mine. The
simple, intimate gesture meant so much to me in
that moment that my grip tightened on his. And I’d
really have to watch out for that. The moment I
became grateful he was spending time with me
would be the beginning of the end. Neither of us
would respect me if that happened.
The Bentley SUV sat at the curb and Gideon’s
driver stood at the ready by the rear door. Gideon
looked at me. “I had some workout clothes
packed and brought over, in case you were set on
visiting your gym. Equinox, right? Or we can go to
mine.”
“Where’s yours?”
“I prefer to go to the CrossTrainer on Thirtyfifth.”
My curiosity over how he knew which gym I
frequented vanished when I heard the “Cross” in
the name of his gym. “You wouldn’t happen to own
the gym, would you?”
His grin flashed. “The chain. Usually, I practice
mixed martial arts with a personal trainer, but I use
the gym occasionally.”
“The chain,” I repeated. “Of course.”
“Your choice,” he said considerately. “I’ll go
wherever you want.”
“By all means, let’s go to your gym.”
He opened the back door, and I slid in and
over. I set my purse and my gym bag on my lap,
and looked out the window as the car pulled away
from the curb. The sedan driving next to us was so
close I wouldn’t have to lean far to touch it. Rush
hour in Manhattan was something I was still
getting used to. SoCal had bumper-to-bumper
traffic, too, but it moved at a snail’s pace. Here in
New York, speed mixed with the crush in a way
that often made me close my eyes and pray to
survive the trip.
It was a whole new world. A new city, new
apartment, new job, and new man. It was a lot to
take on at once. I supposed it was
understandable that I felt off-balance.
I glanced at Gideon and found him staring at
me with an unreadable expression. Everything
inside me twisted into a mess of wild lust and
vibrating anxiety. I had no idea what I was doing
with him, only that I couldn’t stop even if I wanted
to.
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